Thursday, 5 January 2017

Goodbye 2016, Hello 2017


It's been a while since I last posted something on this blog... Apologies for that. I would write all the excuses I have but the truth is quite simple - I just wanted to take some time off and focus on my life. All will become clear in this post, I hope.

So, another year over. How crazy is that? I have been reading other blogs and watched videos on youtube and such where people look back on their year and summarize it. Some say 2016 was amazing, beautiful etc. and others call it the worst year or the hardest year of their life. I can relate more with the latter even though I've achieved numerous amazing things. I think the reason for me saying that 2016 was a hard year of me is due to the stress and anxiety I had to go through in order to achieve those amazing "goals". Now looking back I actually never really got to enjoy those achievements because once I got there, something else was already knocking on my door. On New Year's Eve I had my high school friend over and only after we started talking about the past year did we realise all the things we did and achieved in 2016. 

Firstly, on a personal level, me and my boyfriend had our second year anniversary in the beginning of 2016. It was - and still is - the longest relationship I've ever had and I couldn't be more happier about it. We've been through so much together, all the ups and downs like in any relationship. What makes our relationship so special to me, is that both of us are willing to work for what we have. I feel very lucky and loved to have him by my side.


I hit quite a big milestone in 2016: I graduated from high school. To do so, one has to do the matriculation examinations. What a stressful thing it was! Months and months of studying and preparing and all over in 6 short hours... I did okay, well better than okay actually. There were some disappointments but in the end I'm quite pleased with my results. The graduation day wasn't easy either. I had a migraine since the morning and couldn't even enjoy my "big day". Still, wow... I graduated in 2016! 

All of June I was working in a museum. I wanted to briefly mention this even though to most people a summer job hardly counts as a milestone or a goal. But this was my first actual summer job and I rather enjoyed it. 

After June came the big moment - the results for university entrance exam! Spoiler alert: I got in! This meant that in August/September of 2016 I started studying in university, my major is German. That was such an exciting thing but scary at the same time. I was wondering if I rushed it all. I though that maybe I was in the need of a break, gap year,  but it was too late to back down. It hasn't been an easy semester though. I had a personal crisis right at the beginning of the semester. You see, I went to study German with the mindset that I wanted to be a translator. After two weeks I started to doubt my choice. It isn't clear yet what my study path will be (maybe I'll become a translator after call) but I found a second option (or first, depends on how I look at it), language expert, which also interests me. So after I figured that out, I found my motivation only to lose it again when I got stressed, anxious and had way to much to do and too little time to do that. Needles to say, I've been through quite something this semester. At the same time I'm studying so hard and trying to enjoy my time there and take it easy as well. One thing is for sure, I have work to do in 2017. Not just studying but also finding a balance between university, hobbies, family and friends and me-time. 

What came with entering university was also my move. In August 2016 I moved in with my boyfriend. It was my first ever move and the first time I moved away from my parents' house. We were quite lucky to get the place we live in (I found it, but no bragging...). It fits us both and we are very happy here. The move was quite a challenge even though we did get the place in a good order within a week or so. However, as I'm writing this, our flat looks like we're about to move away but no worries! We're just refurnishing this place a bit and getting rid of unnecessary things.

Also worth mentioning is that I stayed in contact with my high school friend (the same one I mentioned at the beginning of this post). I've learned that I'm not the best at making long lasting friends but when I do, I want to keep them. She and I are studying in different places but we see each other every now and again and keep in contact via texts. I could probably be a better texter though, I'm more of those "face-to-face" kind of talkers.

Those are pretty much the most important milestones or goals or whatever you want to call them of 2016. I'm feeling quite positive about the years to come. I feel a bit more confident and sure about my life and the direction it's going at the moment. I really want 2017 to be a good year. More importantly I really want to listen to myself and do what I want. I definitely could use some relaxation time and me-time every now and again. I want to concentrate on me, my mental and physical health and just do a little better this year. Also, I kind of want to see the world and make an epic trip somewhere!

Here's to 2017!

Thursday, 7 July 2016

Life Update | University


Photo from our last trip to Berlin ©SamiSihvo

Exciting new, everyone! I'll be starting university this year, late August! My major will be German language, for anyone who wanted to know and I'll try and get social studies as a minor since my future dream job is interpreting or translating and I think that social studies could help me out with that.

  This wasn't in any way a sure thing. After the entrance exam I did have a good feeling about the whole thing but I was still nervous until the 1st of July (omg, it's already July, where has the time gone?). My entrance exam was in two parts: the general linguistic part and the language part. As many might know, I speak German as my second native language which means that I'm way over the basic skills in German that they require in the entrance exam. However, the linguistic part was the one that I was more unsure about. There were 25 multiple-choice questions and - if I'm not mistaken now - 12 had to be correct in order to get in (this is a little simplified but you get the general idea). I knew I had 9/25 right and 3/25 that I didn't have any clue of so the chances of me passing that 12 right-answers mark was highly possible.

  I'm so happy about these news. I didn't really have a plan B, maybe do some courses of social study in the Open University and try and find a job but other than that, it was all a blur. I think that's the main reason I'm so glad I got in, at least my next 5 years are going to be studying there.

  I'm not saying that the future wouldn't be scary, I have no idea what university life is all about but at least I can safely find myself and the university life I want without the fear of the absolute unknown. I did cry and feel desperate and anxious the day I found out I got in. I think I had a whole range of emotions that day anyway but I do remember the feeling of anxiety creeping up to me. What if this isn't what I want? What if I'm not ready for university? What if I fail? Those feelings and questions are still there but I'm more happy, excited and glad I got in. No more tears of anxiety, only tears of happiness!  

  What is more, my boyfriend also got in to study history, so we'll now start hunting for our very first flat together. I'm both utterly excited and nervous at the same time. It means I'll finally experience a move (I'm 19 and have never ever moved before) and that I'll be changing my home town but it also means that I need to be a responsible adult, pay my bills on time and manage my own little household. If anyone wants to share some tips on first ever move and living on my own (well, with my boyfriend but I mean living without parents), be sure to leave me a comment!

To finish this off, I quickly wanted to congratulate all of you who also got in to study! How exciting! However, remember that studying is not all there is to life and learning is something that should happen throughout our whole life, not just the years you spend at school or university. There's no shame in keeping a gap year, as there is no shame in not getting a place this time. If it's meant to happen, it'll happen eventually!

Until next time. Take care!

Tuesday, 7 June 2016

Graduation Day 2016

Arriving home after the ceremony

Girlfriend and boyfriend

Brother and sister


  I'm now officially an undergraduate!

  The matriculation exams where on March (for me, anyway) and after that I have been busy studying for entrance exams but now it's all over. My work, well school-related work, is now done and I couldn't be more happier.

  I haven't had the easiest last three years, some might have witnessed this with their own eyes. The stress and the unknown future were quite hard on me and sometimes I just wanted to break down and cry. But I got up, did my best and graduated with moderately good grades. I could've done better but I also could've done so much worse so I'm pretty satisfied with my results.

  Both my school's graduation ceremony and my own graduation party were on Saturday, the 4th of June. I was so nervous about going on stage to get my certificate and my graduation cap that I hardly recall any speeches or performances that were held before the actual graduation. After the ceremony, in true Silvia style I had a really bad headache which later on turned into a migraine. None the less, I had a wonderful day and would like to thank everyone so very much for coming and making the day special. It was truly a day to remember. A special thanks to Marc who kindly photographed the day for me.

  Now on to the next adventures. I don't know what the future holds for me and at the moment I'm okay with that. I''ll keep you updated on my entrance exam results and whether or not I get in to university to study German. I'm naturally hoping for the best and I had a good feeling about the exam but nothing's certain yet. For now, I'll spend a month working in a museum.

  A big thank you to everyone who has been supporting me throughout my school years, you guys are amazing and I wish I could thank you all in person. Also a big thank you to my school (forever a Luostis-girl!) and thank you to my fellow graduates. These three years have been full of tears and hard work but also laughter and good moments.

Until next time! Take care!

P.S. The graduation cap is still white and clean. I promise to take good care of it.

Sunday, 1 May 2016

May Day, May Day | Vappu 2016


Today is May Day, 1st of May. In Finland, many people, however, celebrate May Day already on the 30th of April. The city of Turku has created it's own tradition for this particular day: in the evening people gather around to Taidemuseonmäki, near the Marketplace, where - after some music performances and a speech - every undergraduate will put on their graduation cap. Some of my closest friends had the opportunity to put on their cap this year for the first time, and I'm so happy for them for this achievement. Being there I also took some 150 photos of the whole event.

Enjoy the best takes below. Hauskaa vappua! Happy May Day, everyone!

Undergraduates on the move

 Until next time! Take care!

Thursday, 17 March 2016

Stressed out?

Stress is caused by being 'here' but wanting to be 'there'.
-Eckhart Tolle 


Life can just be really hard and overwhelming sometimes We all have days when we think we are about to lose control. School, work or a personal matter - we all stress over something every now and again. And maybe that's okay. After all, we are all just human. What matters is how we treat stress and how we fight or overcome it.
  Lately I've been feeling extremely stressed out almost to the point that I'm so tired I barely get things done anymore. So instead of wailing over my situation and dreading exams that I need to do, I decided to work towards a happier, better mindset. Today, I wanted to share how I try to de-stress and calm down.

  Have a special place for relaxing. Now this could be anything from a small space in your room, to  a whole room or a place outside. Whatever makes you feel comfortable. In this place there will be no work done, work is not even allowed in the space at all. Making a specific place your own "relaxing zone" is amazing for de-stressing. I haven't found a place of this myself (going against my own tips here...) but I do try to keep my school work on my table and not on my bed, for example.

  Want to know my top tip? Talk it out! This used to be so hard for me. My mother is a psychotherapist and it was really hard for me to go talk to her in the evening after she had come back from work. I felt like a burden. This wasn't just limited to talking with my mum. I still sometimes feel like this but I'm not my mother's patient nor am I a stranger to, for example, my best friend or my boyfriend. I have also talked to some professional "helpers". Sharing your thoughts and problems and allowing yourself to feel vulnerable makes you realise that you don't have to make it on your own every single time. There are other people going through work stress or personal stress, so you're definitely not the only person in this world going through a hard patch and you can be helped, if you so wish. In a few occasions talking has also pretty much solved my problem because I go through it and explain it to someone who doesn't know which makes me realise a) how small my problem is or b) how easy it is to fix.

  Something as simple as a quick workout can make you feel so much better. For me especially running just energizes me and gets my mind of the things that make me stressed. I love the feeling of going out, enjoying the nature and kind of letting go, I guess. Sometimes I listen to music, sometimes I listen to the sounds of nature (spring is coming, birds are singing!). It doesn't really matter how or when I workout, in the morning, during the afternoon, after I've finished studying etc. Since I'm also just a newbie runner I also feel a sense of accomplishment after a run.

  It's pretty self-explanatory that a clean space equals a clean mind, but what it also means that I have to clear out my working space in order to actually study. I do get stressed over clutter so cleaning it makes me feel better. So my next tip, in general, is to tackle small projects, such as clearing out your room or paying the bills. Anything that is doable in a few hours or less is good. You again get a feeling of accomplishment but also you do something that could potentially make you stressed - even if you don't acknowledge it.

  In a way this is sad but I honestly think it's one of the best tips, and that is to cry it out. Very often stress is caused by a lot of things that make you feel controversial and upset but you can't express it. So all these negative feelings are just building up and making your stress even worse. Every once in a while it's okay to just let yourself cry because more often you feel so much better after. I've always been a very emotional person but I only recently learned that it's as okay to show that you're upset as it's okay so show happiness. I can't always help my feelings but I can change my attitude towards it and I choose to let it out.

  Something that has always calmed me down is disconnecting. In today's modern world we are surrounded by constant information and pressure. It's so easy to lose the sense of yourself in all this. So when it feels like my whole world is collapsing, I take time for myself. I need time to understand where I'm standing, what I really want and how I want to accomplish it. In the end I'm living my life for myself and not for someone or something else.  It's up to me what I do.

  Although I find it important to work through these things, it's also important to realise when it is time for a mental breather. It's okay to need time and space. It's okay to figure out whatever it is that is making you feel uneasy. A break doesn't have to be something big. Really it's mostly about taking some time for yourself and enjoying life's little things whether it's reading your favourite book all over again (even though you've read it at least a dozen times) or going for a long hike and exploring your surrounding or just chilling at a coffee shop with your best mates. Do what makes you happy.

Enjoy life's little things :)    ©SilviaGoller

  Until next time! Take care!

Monday, 15 February 2016

Winter's Grace | January 2016


  I haven't been feeling too inspired lately but today I just wanted to take a little time for myself and write a small blog post. This blog post is long time coming but it's finally here. Just a week or two late...

  January 2016 is gone and over with. I've been busy with school and I definitely went through a breakdown or two. Final exams just aren't my cup of tea but I'm confident I'll get through them in the end. I started my "serious" studying right after the New Year's Eve. I haven't really been able to keep up with my study plan though.
  We were just a week into January and I was already feeling desperate and anxious. So I decided to unwind and relax a little. For me that meant to take out my camera and try my best to capture the beautiful - but freezing - winter weather.

Here are some of my best takes :)

Until next time. Take care!

Friday, 25 December 2015

Festive Home Decoration | Christmas 2015

Hello and merry Christmas! 

   I still have a lot of chocolate to eat, Christmas films to watch and a book to read so I won't be spending too much time writing in today's blog post (surely you don't mind). I just wanted to quickly say merry Christmas to everyone. I hope you are all having a wonderful time!

Happy Holidays! Until next time! Take care!